Minerva Three Drabbles
by foscari
Summary: Collection of drabbles and oneshots centering around Minerva's trio, Shinn, Rey & Lunamaria. No yaoi. AU.
1. Sekai

**Title:** Sekai  
**Rating:** K+  
**Warnings:** Unbeta-ed, some OOC-ness  
**Genre:** General, Angst/Humour  
**Main Character(s):** Rey, Lunamaria, Shinn, Athrun, Meyrin, Kira, Lacus, brief Neo, Murrue  
**Ship(s):** KiraxLacus  
**Summary: **In the aftermath of the war, decisions are made. One shot.  
**Disclaimer:** Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed, Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny, characters and places are copyright to Hajime Yate, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise.  
**Author's Notes:** I adore the Minerva Three (as I've come to dubbed them). I rather like seeing them in the friends relationship with each other instead of romance.

* * *

She always hated hospitals. They smell of antiseptic, clean and sterile, death. The infirmary, while it was not a hospital, was not much better than one. Being smaller meant the smells are much more encompassing and she hated it even more. She remembered laying on the bed in Minerva's infirmary while getting patched up after a bout of fight with the Earth Alliance and ORB fleet on earth and her ZAKU had very nearly been destroyed. At that time, Rey had came out unscathed despite the damages he took with his ZAKU. Lunamaria remembered the resentment that she had to be the one injured and out of commission for a few weeks while he was walking around, relatively free from any injuries.

Right now, she didn't feel any resentment. Just worries, fears, anxiety and a thousand other emotions that flipped-flopped in her belly as she followed after Shinn in a run. Meyrin was behind her, trying to catch up as usual but not calling out for her. They have much to resolve during their time here on board the Archangel. Ironic how this was supposedly the enemy vessel and yet they were given shelter, help and medical treatment for their injuries. Shinn had a dislocated shoulder; his arm had been put in a sling to prevent anymore damage. A swath of bandage was wrapped around his head, strands of dark hair sticking out. Luna had bruised ribs and a sprained ankle which had been taped and she was ignoring the pain as she ran.

"Rey!" Shinn had thrown open the door, after running pell mell along the length of the ship and bursting into the infirmary. His eyes scanned the place before falling on his friend laying on the bed. A man who had been sitting on a chair by the bed stood up as soon as they arrived. Shinn's eyes narrowed at the sight of their former commander, Athrun Zala but he said nothing of it as he made his way towards the bed. Luna let out a breath she had been holding, limping towards the direction as well. Meyrin hesitated then followed.

Rey looked so much smaller and much more frail than usual. His face was pale, an almost waxy hue. An IV was attached to the back on his right hand. His left arm was in a cast. Luna could see the dark bruises along his collarbone and jawline. He must have hit his head against the controls, despite the harness's supposed job to keep him strapped down. The doctors had washed out the blood from his hair but they missed some; she could see the dark brown stains coating the golden strands.

"Rey!" Shinn called again, staring down, eyes wide as if it was the first time he was seeing a comrade badly injured. Luna couldn't blame him. It was the same when he saw her.

Blurry blue eyes fluttered open, fuzzy with sleep and the morphine they gave him for the pain, blinking up at them for a moment. The bewilderment faded, replaced with recognition when he saw who they were. He tried to smile but it came out as a grimace instead. When he attempted to lift his left hand, Luna quickly placed her hand on top of his, preventing him from doing any further damage to the healing bones.

"Don't," she told him stiffly. "It's in a cast and don't yank out the IV in the other one."

He stared at her, as if trying to remember when had she even been concern for him after their friendship had been deteriorate to sniping at each other and vying for Shinn's attention, as if it was competition to sway him to each of their side.

"You're all right," Shinn cut in the tensed moment. He was either oblivious to it or he chose to ignore it. Luna guessed the latter. "I was so worried. I thought the Requiem would have blown you to tiny bits but you're okay now."

"Am I?" Rey stared at the ceiling. "Do you think that I'm okay now?"

Shinn looked flustered. "Well, I mean... they patched you up and you're– you're fine now. You're not dead."

"I'm better off dead," Rey said emotionlessly.

An awkward silence filled the room, saved for Meyrin's sharp intake of breath. Shinn's eyes had grown wide, mouth opened but no words were coming out. He looked stunned and he tightened his hands into fists as he stood there, bowing his head, letting the bangs hide his expression. Lunamaria was the one who spoke up.

"Then go ahead and die," she snapped, voice disdainful and filled with bitter resentment. "If it's what will make you feel better. You didn't even think about how worried all of us are, especially Shinn here. You're so selfish, always have been! Did you think that dying would have make it better?"

"You don't know anything!" Rey was hardly ever angry; he hardly ever raised his voice as well and this was the first time they were seeing it. Two spots of colour appeared on his cheeks and his eyes were a steely blue as he glared at her. He had managed to sit up so that he wouldn't have to face off laying down; it made him vulnerable.

"Maybe because you don't tell us anything!" Lunamaria shouted back, eyes brimming with tears. She was so furious, she wanted to kick someone, something or maybe even hit him but she didn't. She just curled her hands into fists, nails digging into the palms of her hands. "How can you expect us to trust you when you hardly ever told us anything! He's dead, Rey! Live with it!"

Rey recoiled as if he had been slapped, eyes widening, something akin to horror crossing his face. He opened his mouth to say something but a choked sound came out as he lowered his eyes, looking at the floor instead of their faces. His shoulders shook with suppressed anger and possibly tears.

"Luna!" Shinn snapped, head snapping back up so fast he might break his neck. There was stunned disbelief on his face and undisguised anger at her remarks. "Stop. Just stop."

She made a sound at the back of her throat, her scowl deepening at them both. They've always been that way, even back at the Academy. They kept their secrets, exchanging those knowing looks and left her out of the loop.

"Rey, please, don't fight with her anymore," Shinn continued, this time in a much quieter tone. "I know you both have your issues and I hate to see you both fight. You're both my best friends. Just let it go, Rey. It's over. The Chairman... he's dead."

"And if you want to join him so much, you're welcome to it," Lunamaria added spitefully, unable to help herself.

"Oneesan!" This time, it was Meyrin. She looked between them, trying to understand. She hadn't been there at the Minerva for the last several weeks. She didn't really know what had happened between them but she knew that she disliked seeing them fight among each other. They used to be friends, all of them. What had happened while I was gone? she wondered, bitting her lower lip.

"He has no use for me in the end," Rey finally said, voice low and filled with such a hurt that Luna's anger abated and she felt the ache start in her chest. "Just like that girl, Mia Campbell. Everyone's useful to him as long as he wants us to. I'm nothing more to him than just being a tool."

"That's not true." Shinn sat down next to him. "Rey, you know it's not true. The Chairman... he did care for you. I know he did."

"In that strange way of his," Luna added with a sniff; it was not as contemptuous as before. She fell silent for a beat before she continued. "Rey, I know we haven't seen eye to eye in the last several weeks but I don't want you to hate me anymore and... and I don't think I want to hate you as well. We're friends. We all used to be such good friends. What happened?"

"The Chairman happened." Athrun Zala finally spoke up. "He lied to all you, to everyone of us. His words, they may sound true and good but they're not. He was good at swaying those to his side. Once he had his uses with you, you will be thrown to one side or be killed."

"But it's over now," the man cut in, tone light-hearted, clearly trying to break the sombre mood. He knelt by the bed, placing a hand on Rey's shoulder. "He's dead and you're free of him."

"What makes you think I want to be free of him," Rey grounded out, clenching his right hand, despite the IV in it. He looked away, letting his hair fall on his face, hiding his emotions from them. Gilbert... he had fired the Requiem at Archangel, and Rey had actually been in the way, fighting with Strike Freedom. He didn't even bother to check whether Rey had been safely out of the beam's way or not before firing. Rey had jerked Legend back but couldn't avoid the searing heat that melted the gundam's arm and leg, destroying them. He had been so stunned by Gilbert's callous act that he didn't even react when Strike Freedom disabled Legend, rendering it useless.

"Because you do," the man said, his tone earnest and sincere. "He was someone to you, wasn't he? More than just the Chairman."

"He's no one to me now." Rey loosened his fist, curling his fingers lightly. His voice was hushed, choked with unshed tears. He refused to cry. He would not show weakness before them, least of all to this man. "Just like I'm no one to him."

"Don't say that!" Luna said, a bit more sharply than she meant to. She looked angry but the anger was not directed at him. Not anymore. "You're Rey Za Burrel. You're someone to me, to Shinn, to everyone on Minerva," she continued with conviction. "You're our friend. My friend." She ended softly. "Don't ever think that. It doesn't matter anymore. He doesn't matter anymore."

"Isn't this the world we wanted?" Shinn said, a smile on his face. "It may not be the world he had wanted but it's the world we wanted, isn't it? You're here, so am I and Luna and Meyrin. We're the only family now... that is, if you want us." He scuffed his boot nervously on the floor.

Lunamaria watched as Rey struggled with his emotions; saw the various expressions that flitted across his normally stoic features until it settled on one. He nodded slowly. "Aa."

Shinn's face lit up, a wide grin spreading across his face. He turned to Lunamaria. "Do you hear that, Luna? We're a family now!" She rolled her eyes at him, inwardly happy for him as well. All of them had gone through a hard time in the past year.

"Who are you and what have you done with Shinn Asuka?" Rey mock-glared at his best friend. "The real one is always so angry and confused."

"Are you saying I have problems with my anger?" Shinn said indignantly.

"No, I'm saying Meyrin should stop make eyes at Zala and go for it." Rey watched with satisfaction as Meyrin turned as red as her hair and Athrun suddenly found the wall next to him interesting. Lunamaria stifled her giggle while Shinn just looked bewildered at the sudden change of topic. The man coughed lightly, clearly amused as well.

The door opened once more, this time admitting the pilot of Strike Freedom, the real Lacus Clyne (it was uncanny how the false one was identical down to the cherry-pink hair) and the Archangel captain. Shinn and Lunamaria immediately snapped a salute to her. Rey would have but with an IV tube attached to one hand and the other in a cast, he simply tilted his head in a greeting.

"I'm glad to see everyone is feeling better," Lacus said with a warm smile at them.

"A-arigatou, Lacus-san and Ramius-kanchou," Shinn stuttered a bit. "For taking us in, even though we– "

Captain Ramius raised a hand to stop him. "No formalities. Just Murrue-san will do. And all of you are no longer enemies, ne?" She tilted her head to one side in a playful manner that wasn't seen in Captain Gladys, a smile on her face. "The three of you are welcomed to stay on Archangel until your injuries are healed."

"Thank you, Captain," Rey said quietly. She nodded.

"The Minerva..." Shinn looked to her, biting his lower lip.

"Gladys-kanchou gave permission for you three," Murrue told them. She saw the relieved expression on Lunamaria and Shinn's faces while Rey's was impassive. "Although, she would like a word with you, Meyrin."

Meyrin started, shot a worried look at her older sister and Athrun, mouth open to say something but Murrue beat her to it. "Later. After everything and everyone has settled down."

"H-hai."

"I'll leave you all here. Neo, would you mind accompanying me back to the bridge?" Murrue gave him a meaningful look.

Neo? Shinn realized with a start this was the man that Stellar had been calling out during her time on board the Minerva's infirmary. Rage welled up inside him when he remembered the promise the man had made then broken, by making Stellar fight once more. Then, the anger deflated. Everyone had lost, not only him and he had a feeling that Stellar's death affected the man much more than him. It must have hurt to lost someone you've grown attached to, maybe even love. He turned to his friends, wondering how it would have been like if he had lost them both. The two adults left the room, leaving the seven of them in the awkward silence.

Lunamaria wasn't sure what to say to Athrun and Meyrin. She missed her sister terribly but while they had bantered like they used to just now, it just wasn't the same anymore. So much had changed between them.

"You were dead," Luna said, surprising them. She looked directly at the two. "Both of you."

"We survived," Athrun answered. "One of ORB's fleet picked us up."

"I'm... sorry," Shinn said, looking down. "I didn't..."

"You were given an order," Athrun said kindly. "Although you didn't help much," he added accusingly at Rey, though his tone was light. "You can be his very own pep cheerleader next time. 'Shinn, don't listen to Athrun! He's confusing you!'"

Shinn made a face at that. "I'm not confused all the time!" he protested weakly. "Am I?" he asked Meyrin who shrugged. Lacus Clyne giggled. Next to her, the Strike Freedom pilot smiled.

Rey raised an eyebrow at that but said nothing, knowing it a stab at the teasing he did just now but still... "I had my orders as well," he murmured. "I never... I'm sorry," he whispered.

"It's over, that's what counts," Athrun told him. "I forgave you. Dullindal... he wasn't exactly the model of a perfect father figure with that warped mind of his."

This was getting too sombre and Meyrin could see it as well. She turned to her sister. Luna fixed a bright, cheery smile on her face (it was genuine) and threw her arms over Athrun's shoulder and the other over Shinn's. Athrun gave her a look which she ignored. Shinn merely sighed.

"Bygones be bygones!" she chirped. "It's over isn't it? We shouldn't let it bring us down. We should look forward to the future and move on. No sense in dwelling in the past."

"Luna is right," Rey said. "Dwelling in the past doesn't change anything." He lifted his head, smiling at them. "This is the world we wanted, isn't it? Then, we need to do our best to live in it."

Meyrin nodded with a smile while her sister grinned.

"We can start over," the pilot of Strike Freedom said, stepping forward, breaking his silence. Shinn nearly jumped. The guy was even quieter than Rey, and that was saying a lot. He had a sincere smile on his face as he held out his hand to him. "Kira Yamato."

"Shinn Asuka."

Owari.


	2. Tadaima

**Title:** Tadaima  
**Rating:** K+  
**Warnings:** Unbeta-ed, some OOC-ness  
**Genre:** General, Angst  
**Main Character(s):** Shinn, Rey, Lunamaria  
**Ship(s):** None.  
**Summary:** Shinn returns home. One shot.  
**Disclaimer:** Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed, Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny, characters and places are copyright to Hajime Yate, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise.  
**Author's Notes:** Took me two weeks to write this part. I didn't want to make Shinn sound like a stubborn mule but as someone who had learned something. Besides, ORB is the one place he will always call home.

* * *

He woke up with a sharp intake of breath, blinking auburn eyes up at the ceiling. Letting out a breath, Shinn dragged his hand down his face before pushing his dark hair back. The room was dimly lit by the single lamp on the night stand at the foot of his bed. It was quiet, save for the steady breathing across from him. He sat up, pushing the blanket back as he looked across the room, able to make out Rey's sleeping form in the bed, bundled up in the blanket, only the top of his head peeking out.

He had been dreaming about the war again, despite it being over weeks ago. He couldn't still shake it off. The fear and rage that drove him to nearly killing one of his closest and best friends, all because he wanted to beat Athrun Zala. The relief when ORB wasn't destroyed and the sight of the Messiah falling, crumbling to nothing. He felt free then, from the weight around his shoulders and had cried, held by Luna on the lunar base. He had never wanted ORB destroyed. It was never part of his intention, despite what he may have said or done. He did love ORB. Athrun was right.

The three of them - Lunamaria included - still remained on the Archangel. The Minerva had been dragged back to ZAFT's military base for repairs, crew members were grounded until further notice. PLANT was in an uproar over the death of the Chairman and the destruction of Messiah, Earth Alliance's Heaven Base and lunar base, Arzchael. The former members of the Supreme Council had been called back to handle the current chaotic aftermath. Captain Gladys had been wise to put them on the Archangel, away from the mess and from the attention. They were to return to PLANT when they felt they were ready, though the way she had said it implied that she knew deep down they probably won't be returning to PLANT anytime soon.

Rey was still recovering, the broken arm still in that soft cast and sling. The bruises and scrapes had healed well. Lunamaria was able to walk around normally instead of the hobble. His own wounds had healed as well, leaving only superficial scars. The Archangel's captain, Ramius, had been kind towards them, allowing them freedom on board, despite that they had been enemies before. Most of the crew were still wary of them; though Kira Yamato, Athrun Zala, Lacus Clyne and Mwu La Fllaga acted differently, treating them without reservations or wariness.

_We were all fighting for the same thing, ne?_

That had been Lacus Clyne, the warm smile on her face as they met face to face for the first time. It took Shinn a while to get used to it, that she was the real one, not the bubbly copy that they had seen several months back. The real one radiate a quiet confidence and calmness that the copy could never acquire, no matter how many times she sang the songs or tried so hard to be. Lacus Clyne was forgiving as shown when instead of hatred, she looked at them with sympathy and gentleness. And he had thought how lucky Kira Yamato was, to have someone to be with for a long time, to grow old with and to love.

"Shinn?" The voice was thick with sleep and exhaustion, breaking into his thoughts. He looked up, across the room to see Rey had woken up as well, blinking sleepily at him, the eyebrows drawn together in obvious puzzlement.

"Couldn't sleep," he told him.

"Nightmares?"

"Sort of."

"Ah." Rey shifted over to his side, carefully resting the arm on the bed. Sleeping with a cast was certainly not much fun and a nuisance, Shinn thought dryly. It was a wonder the blond didn't complain or whine about it but that was Rey. He took things without complaints. Not even... Shinn pushed the thought out of his mind angrily. He would have plenty of time to think about _that_. Now was not the time.

Despite the manipulative lies Rey had told him over the year, Shinn found that he could still trust him and call him his best friend. Call him a fool for trusting someone who could just easily lie about anything to him but he knew the reasons why Rey did it. Living in another person's shadow, expected to follow in that footsteps and never getting a chance to be yourself? That was just as bad as what the EA had been doing to the hapless children in that lab. With the Chairman gone from their lives, Shinn hoped that Rey would be able to break free from the constraints placed on him by the man and start over.

"Go back to sleep," Shinn said, after a while. "You're still recovering."

"And you're not?" There was amusement in the tone. Auburn eyes met blue before Shinn sighed, turning away and flopped back down to bed. He stared up at the ceiling once more, hearing the rustles that Rey had turned over on his back as well. There was a comfortable silence between them as they lay awake.

"Are you going back to PLANT?" he asked, breaking the silence. His hand reached out for the pink cell phone next to his pillow. Ironic that it was the only thing that survived the blast that day.

For a moment, it seemed as though Rey wasn't going to answer but when he spoke his voice was so soft, Shinn had to strain to hear.

"No. I'm not. There's just... too many things there that I don't want to be reminded of." A pause. "Gladys-kanchou made arrangements for me already. I'm to stay with Ramius and La Fllaga on ORB."

La Fllaga. Formerly Neo Lorrnoke who turned out to Mwu La Fllaga who was thought to be dead and turned out alive after all. Shinn remembered feeling that tightness in his chest when he saw them, Stellar on his mind. He had thought it unfair that man survived and was reunited with the love of his life while he lost someone he had grown to love in a short time. It had been a bittersweet moment until Lunamaria touched his arm and he had smiled wistfully. No use dwelling in the past with regrets. He was deep in thought that he nearly missed Rey's question.

"Will you return to ORB?"

"Will I... ORB?" Shinn blinked, looking over but Rey was staring up at the ceiling; at the patterns on it thrown by the light, his good arm across his forehead, eyes closed.

_You were from ORB, weren't you? You used to love it and its ideals!_

Athrun's words came back in his head during their fight at ORB. They had clashed at each other, him trying to take the other boy down. I_ did... and I still do_, he answered in his mind._ ORB is... will always be home_. Did he want to return to that place? The place where all his sorrow, grief and pain start. He lifted up Mayu's phone, flipping the cover open and look through the pictures of his parents, his sister, himself. He had no place to go, really. No one at PLANT, no one at ORB. All he had left were his two friends. They were his only family now.

"PLANT and ZAFT have nothing for me anymore," he said with finality, voice firm and filled with resolution.

A soft chuckle. "You do know that Luna is going to follow, right?"

Shinn stared at the phone before clicking the cover shut and placing it under the pillow. "Aa. I know." He felt a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

Lunamaria was sure to follow them both. The girl had grown possessively attached to them both after the event; after she had found out Rey's condition and saw Shinn breaking down before her. She had took it upon herself to be the mother hen of the trio, insisting that if she wasn't around, they would both fall apart before her and all that. Rey had accepted without any grumbling but Shinn himself had protested loudly, saying wasn't it his job to protect her? One look from the redhead had silenced him; the look was fit to kill, if not maim. He had wondered when had she grown so fierce in such a short while, when had she matured so fast to take on such a role? He put it all to her being the older sibling of the family while he and Rey were immediately put into the younger siblings role that Meyrin had been. Rey had privately told him that it was precisely because Meyrin had left for PLANT that Lunamaria saw fit to boss them around like any older sister would. Exert her power to show them who's in charge. Shinn had agreed fervently.

"It'll be all right," came Rey's voice. Shinn made a sound like an agreement. He laid there until Rey's breathing even out and slowed, letting him know that the other boy was asleep. He stayed awake for a while before he drifted off to sleep as well.

The blue ocean that surrounded Onogoro Island sparkled under the bright sun like jewels. In the distance, he could hear the sea gulls crying against the sound of the waves. He remembered standing here before with a heart full of rage and hurt that time. It still hurt but no longer filled with the same rage before. Flowers had been planted and had grown around the marble stone. A memorial for those who had passed on.

New grass and flowers had sprung over the spot where the tragedy had happened, covering the scorched ground. It was as if it had never happened at all. He remembered that spot well. It had been in his nightmares for years. He turned away from that place, looking at the marble stone before him, kneeling down and placing the flowers he had brought on the ground, fingers lingering at the soft petals for a beat longer before he stood up, stuffing his hands into his pockets. Behind him, Rey and Lunamaria made no sound as they waited; Luna looked as if she might burst into tears from the way her eyes were so wide and she was biting her lower lip. Rey was looking over at the ocean, face impassive as usual but there was a hint of emotion in those eyes.

He turned to them with a small smile. "Let's go."

"Hai." Luna's smile was much brighter. Rey nodded.

_Tousan, Kaasan, Mayu-chan. Tadaima. I'm home._

Owari.


	3. Rain

**Title:** Ame  
**Rating:** K+  
**Warnings:** Unbeta-ed, some OOC-ness  
**Genre:** General  
**Main Character(s):** Lunamaria, Shinn  
**Ship(s):** None.  
**Summary: **Lunamaria had always hated the rain. It's cold and wet. One shot.  
**Disclaimer:** Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed, Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny, characters and places are copyright to Hajime Yate, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise.  
**Author's Notes:** I hate the rain and cold. It was raining when I wrote this. I peg Luna and Shinn to be more of sunshine people than rain people.

* * *

It was raining again. It had been for days and it seemed to put her in a melancholy mood.

The rain pattered against the windows, creating strange patterns as it spattered and dripped in rivulets down the clear glass, creating small rivers as they slide down to gather in puddles.

She had never been one of those girls who drone on and on about how life was unfair or one of those self-absorbed girls around her in college. She was just herself; cheerful, bright, vibrant. Those had been Shinn's words to her when she had asked, in a fit of playfulness what he thought of her, the other day at the sidewalk café. The dark-haired boy had stammered and stuttered, turning bright red before blurting out the answer. Rey had hid his expression behind the mane of honey-blond hair, hiding his laugh behind a cough.

Still, the words had meant so much more to her, coming from one of her closest friends. She had a lot of friends during her Academy days, on board the Minerva, gaining a few more after the war. The new friends weren't as close to her as the other two. They don't know her well but what they know, the found likeable. Same with her classmates from college.

Civilian life was supposed to be so carefree, no worries about when the next attack was coming or whether you were going to live or die. She had signed up for the local university when the chance came up, wanting to enfold herself into the more mundane, normal life as much as possible. Shinn had told her that was great in an almost wistful tone, prompting her to ask him to join her before her gave her a shake of his head. Rey wasn't too keen on being around so many people with his condition.

She had wanted to forget, actually. To leave behind the life she knew; the life that was a soldier and nothing else. To wash her hands clean of the stains that never seemed to be clean, to clear the memories of the faceless and nameless soldiers she had killed. She had nightmares sometimes, of the battle at Messiah and Requiem, sometimes of the one at ORB or the one where she was injured for the first time in a fight. Nowadays, the nightmares were of Shinn beaing beaten by the red gundam she had grown to hate, the Messiah exploding in pieces and Rey never surviving it at all. She'd wake up with tears on her face as she calmed her erratic heart and remembered that they were alive and here.

The glass was cool to the touch as she leaned her forehead against it, looking outside to the people below, scurrying about with their umbrellas. Some were dashing to the nearest shelter, arms thrown over their heads, as if it could ward off the rain or repel it off them. It only got their sleeves wetter. Cars sped by, splashing up puddles at the pedestrians. She watched as one yelled something at the passing car, shaking a fist, probably something obscene. She felt a tiny quirk of lips at that, enjoying watching the people outside getting drenched by the rain while she was warm and dry inside her apartment. She wondered where did the sadistic streak came from and realized it was probably from Shinn. He was a terrible influence on her but then, so was Rey.

Like Athrun on Meyrin? the tiny voice taunted before she could swat it away. She bit her lower lip, eyes darkening to a deep indigo as she remembered how truly furious she had felt when she realized that Athrun had taken her sister away. She still blamed him, was still angry at him, though not as furious as before. She was civil to him but no longer exude the open friendliness towards him.

The front door slamming shut jarred her out of her musings and she craned her head to see Shinn stomping further into the open living room, dripping water everywhere. He was soaked to the bone, dark hair plastered to his face, clothes sticking to him like a second skin and he looked cross. Probably got caught in the rain, she mused, getting up from the window seat, making her way towards him.

"Ah, don't drip on the carpet," she said, frowning a little.

"It's not like I can stop it," he said to her waspishly. His temper hadn't lessened at all, if anything, he was even grouchier than ever. She felt a pang in her chest; she would be as well, if she was being turned down for nearly every other job or getting fired.

"Shinn," she began with a sigh then shut up at his expression. He stripped the soppy jacket off, letting it fall onto the fall and strode towards the bathroom without a word. She worried her lower lip before picking it up and heading the same way.

The rain was making everything miserable and dull, everything so grey and depressing.

"You should try and keep your temper, you know," she said conversationally, leaning against the wall, his wadded up jacket held in her hands, dripping icy cold water down her bare legs. "This is your fifth time? What happened this time?"

"Nothing." The door was yanked open and he came out, a towel wrapped around his waist, looking visibly calmer but his auburn eyes still held that seething anger inside.

She held her tongue, knowing him. He wouldn't want to be pushed. When it was right and he had cooled down, he would talk to her about it. Sometimes, she wished she was like Rey. Their youngest member of the trio was most likely to have picked up on Shinn's feelings and would say the few magic words and everything was better. Except Rey wasn't around at the moment and Luna didn't know any magic words save for 'please' and 'thank you' which her parents drilled into her.

The slamming of the bedroom door jerked her out of her thoughts, and she cursed herself for even daydreaming at a time like this. She sighed, tossing the wet jacket into the sink; she'll do the laundry later, and walked into the kitchen where he was, sitting at the table and staring broodily at nothing. They were both silent as she busily made tea, placing the mug before him, watching as the steam waffed before his face.

"The old man got mad again," he said without preamble, eyes fixed on the liquid in his mug. He didn't look up at her. "I mixed up some orders and the customers' goods will have to wait for another week before they arrive."

"Oh, Shinn." Lunamaria knew how hard it was to adjust to civilian life once more. To pretend that you don't have hair-trigger reflexes, to paste on a smile when people around you talk about the horrors of war, to pretend not to know how to take apart a gun and assemble it in under five seconds. It was a difficult transition, one which she had gone through when she enrolled in college, started classes with more than fifty people in one classroom.

Lunamaria Hawke was never going to outgrow her soldier's reflexes, not even when she grew old, it would remain with her. Alert, wary and cautious.

"Maybe working with Mr Wilks is not your thing," she said helpfully. "Why not to enlist into the military? That's where you belong, isn't it?"

He stiffened, and she knew she had brought up a sore subject. He was still not on good terms with Representative Athla and Athrun Zala. Who could blame him? Luna didn't know Cagalli-san that well and only remember her from the time she had been on the Minerva. She had seemed to be a strong-headed and short tempered young woman. Frankly, Luna had thought she was very bossy and just as selfish. That had been her opinion then. Cagalli was still bossy but no longer selfish.

"I don't want to go back there," he snapped. "She's the head of the military operation. She runs it, even though she has help from one of the generals. I don't want to see her. Not yet."

"If being the military is all that you know and love, then why not?" Luna realized a beat later she had stood up. Shinn was staring at her, and she belatedly realized she had shouted as well. "Shinn, you can go from job to job, working for those half-arsed paychecks that pays half of what you used to earn when you have much more potential than that! Re-enlist into the military, to ORB's military. They could use someone like you. You have a lot of offer them and– and I know that Cagalli-san isn't that petty to hold a grudge against you. You love it, don't you? Piloting your own gundam, able to fly in the skies without any restrains or boundaries. This is what you're supposed to do, not working as a sales clerk or delivery boy. You're always going to be a pilot."

Hours later, after they had a silent dinner and Shinn had went to bed, Luna sat on her bed, leaning against the window. Shinn was forever going to remain a pilot no matter how old he got, she was going to live out the rest of her civilian life pretending to be ordinary when she was not and Rey was... He was going to keep on living, that was all he could do. That was what they knew and nothing more.

Outside, the rain kept pouring down in sheets. She lay back down on her bed, yanking the blanket over her head.

She hated the rain.

It was grey and miserable.

Owari.


	4. Normal

**Title:** Normal  
**Rating:** K+  
**Warnings:** Unbeta-ed, some OOC-ness  
**Genre:** General, Angst/Humour  
**Main Character(s):** Rey, Mwu, mention of Murrue  
**Ship(s):** Mention of MwuxMurr  
**Summary:** Rey does a little weeding in the backyard and some thinking. One shot.  
**Disclaimer:** Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed, Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny, characters and places are copyright to Hajime Yate, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise.  
**Author's Notes:** This turned out with a sort of angst-ridden humour than I intended.

* * *

He had been here few months now. While Luna had returned immediately to a resemblance of normal life by enrolling herself into a local university and Shinn was still trying to find his place with his many odd jobs, he was counted as the luckier of the three. He didn't have to work, per say, but he could have. Maybe try to live a life that was as close to normal was, except he grew up not exactly normal and he had no idea what normalcy was. Being normal meant not having a trigger-reflex, being normal meant not knowing how to pilot a gundam or to tune it up to the best, being normal meant never having firing a gun once in your life, being normal meant having a real proper family with siblings and pets, not living in a house with two military officers and knowing exactly what they were talking about at the dinner table.

His life had been far from normal from the day he had been created, moulded into the perfection he was supposed to be, except he wasn't perfect, he had a flaw. That flaw could very well one day end his life today or tomorrow or maybe next year. He didn't know when, only his life was short as it is, and while the scientists were working day and night to try and prolong his life, he knew it was futile. Maybe it was the pessimist in him talking. Still, he kept the little thing called hope up, trying not to let his guardians down and living as normal as possible, doing all the normal mundane things like chores or viciously hacking away at the overgrown hedges and yanking the weeds from the garden beds when Murrue got too busy to do it or Mwu forgot to trim the hedges.

So, here he was, in the warm afternoon with the sun beating down his back, as he ripped the weeds up with the same precision that he used to gun down an enemy mobile suit, except he had never tried to yank off the enemy mobile suit's head or arms or legs. Perhaps he should have tried it last time. Yanking up those crawlers gave him an immense amount of satisfaction which he couldn't quite explain. It wasn't until someone came from behind him and he and whirled around, the small, spade in hand as if he was going to use it to clobber whoever it had been, that he realized he had slipped into the past again.

The spade was pointed right at a bemused La Fllaga's nose, the man standing an easygoing countenance, despite nearly being batter by the thing. It was another thing that made him wonder if he would actually live a normal life once more. Maybe he should have enroll in some learning institute, except he wasn't sure if he should be in high school or college, seeing as he didn't really know how old he was. Or maybe he should just get one of those jobs, sitting behind the cashier and looking bored all day.

"Easy," said Mwu, holding two hands up in a placating gesture.

Rey blinked at him. "Sorry."

He returned back to attacking the weeds, very much aware of how close Mwu was standiing behind him because it was sending those little tingles down his spine, telling him of another person who had the sixth sense was near him. It was one of those Newtype abilities. Surprisingly, Kira Yamato also had that sixth sense as well but then, he was the Ultimate Coordinator, after all and Rey was just another clone, a failed attempt at trying to recreate the Ultimate Coordinator like Dr Hibiki had done eighteen years ago. Thinking about it made his chest hurt and his eyes blurry, it made his head pound with that familiar voice he now hated.

"I think that Murrue would much rather have her daffodils intact."

The voice broke into his inner turmoil, like the sun coming out after a storm, parting away the dark clouds. He sucked in a breath, realizing he had practically decapitated the flowers with the spade. He made a small annoyed sound, throwing the spade to one side, not watching as it landed right into the roses; someone was going to get all scratched up looking for it later. Instead, he curled his hands into tight fists on his lap, staring at the earth before him, free of the weeds. He wondered if he will ever be really free from that man, Gilbert Dullindal, who had haunted him and refused to leave even when Rey was trying to move on. Does one ever move on from the past?

He'd seen Shinn struggling to find his place in this new world, trying to live a normal life and yet, unable to let go of the past and what he is. He'd seen Lunamaria, despite her insisting she was fine and doing things like the civilians do like going to school, she still had that haunted expression in her eyes. In the worse days, he'd seen how she had lapse into silence when the subject about the war was brought up or she was to a write a report on it. He wondered how Athrun Zala, Kira Yamato and the others live through it day by day, able to even leave it all behind or so it seem. Maybe they never do, the past was always going to be there, no matter how far you run from it. It was like the shadow under your feet. He certainly felt that way.

"Rey?"

He was glad he didn't have the stupid spade in hand or else he would have slammed it into Mwu's head when the hand unexpectedly touched his shoulder. He jumped a little, then his shoulders drooped slightly as he finally turned to the man who had been a sort of father figure to him now. He was a much nicer person than Gilbert ever was, much more honest, kinder, more truthful. The eyes were blue, not amber. Gilbert had no scar on his face.

"How do you do it?" he asked instead, staring ahead at the sparkling sea. The wind smelled of salt and seawater. "Living like this, day in, day out, trying to be normal. How do you do it? Not even thinking about the past constantly and wondering if things will stay that way."

"I don't," said Mwu easily, crouching down next to him. "I do think about the past, what ifs and what could haves but I don't dwell on it. It drags you down, makes you doubt a lot of things. I look to the future. It gets easier as time goes by. Sounds cliche, I know but it really does."

"So, all I have to do is to keep doing what I'm doing everyday and it gets better?" He arched a fine, sandy brow at the older man.

"I'd recommend not killing off Murrue's flowers first," said Mwu, chuckling. "But, yeah. It does, sort of." The smile died away to be replaced with seriousness. "I don't want to thrust you into the world or a job or school right away. It takes time. You need time, to adjust. So, if I pitch you straight into a job, a non-military one, you'd probably feel off balance like your friend does. He should enlist into ORB's military, by the way. He'd make a damn good pilot. Cagalli-san could use someone with his skills."

"He's being mule-headed," Rey found himself saying. "Luna is trying too hard."

"And you?"

"Weeding." He held up the weeds. "And killing flowers, it seems."

Mwu laughed, ruffled his already tousled hair from the wind, getting up to stand. "Don't think too much about the past or him. He's no longer behind you."

Rey mulled over the words he said for a moment before he started on the attack on the weeds once more.

He was certainly adapting well into the normal life, he concluded.

Owari.


	5. Mirai

**Title:** Mirai  
**Rating:** K+  
**Warnings:** Unbeta-ed, some OOC-ness  
**Genre:** General  
**Main Character(s):** Shinn, mentions of Luna, Rey, Cagalli  
**Ship(s):** None  
**Summary:** You will always be a pilot. One shot.  
**Disclaimer:** Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed, Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny, characters and places are copyright to Hajime Yate, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise.  
**Author's Notes:** Rather short one this time. I have deadlines looming.

* * *

This wasn't the job he wanted or liked. It wasn't even what he wanted to do at all but beggars can't be choosers and he didn't have much choice in the matter. He didn't have a wide range of experience, save for piloting a mobile suit, assembling a gun and blowing up in the face of an important figure of a country. The first time he'd went for a job interview, the manager had snidely told him that a gundam pilot belonged to the military and not in this world of peace; there was no place for him here, so he might as well leave.

He had tried several, most turning him down flat when they knew his old job had been. No one wanted a volatile _former_ pilot, much less one who piloted one of those gundams for ZAFT. So, he had rewrote his resume, exclude out the name of the military organization he had been in and listed his previous experience as just a mobile suit pilot. If anyone asked, he would just say he had flown a mobile suit unit before, and that was all.

He was hired, briefly by a rather crotchety old man, who ran a trading store. The working period lasted less than two days, ending as soon as he fudged up the purchase orders for one of the old man's most important clients. It hadn't even been his fault; he just had never done paperwork in his entire life, not counting assignments during his academy days. How was he to know to what to fill in and where to file? Deep down, though, he knew that it was partially his own fault for not asking for help and doing it right. He had this rebellious streak in him that does the opposite of what he had been told to do. He had never been good at following orders.

He had circled nearly every available job openings on the island, went for interviews, only to be turned down flatly or given the weak excuse of, "We'll call you" by them. He gripped at his hair, giving it a vicious yank as he pushed the newspaper aside angrily. It wasn't that he was in a desperate need to work or for the money, but he needed something to do, to occupy his time. Something to give back to this place he had called home. Call it his penance, for attempting to destroy it some months back.

His eyes fell on the application forms which Rey had requested for Mwu-san to pick up from the base for him. Luna had picked the sheaf of papers from the La Fllaga home, handing it over to him silently earlier that day, her indigo eyes filled with hope and a plea for him to just consider it. She had said nothing to him about it, afterwards, leaving for her afternoon classes, telling him she would be home late.

He stared at the papers before him, at the insignia of ORB, the lion, a symbol of strength and pride. He didn't want to, really but even he knew when he had come to a standstill and was beaten. There wasn't any choice left for him, unless he wanted to remind working as a waiter or a delivery boy his entire life.

_You want to give back to ORB? Then, consider it. What's the worse that could happen?_ Luna's voice rang in his head. _This isn't who you are. You're a pilot, will always be one._

The worst could happen was he might get rejected.

Reluctantly, he drew the first page towards him, picked up the pen that had been at the table and began to fill it in.

When he went to the base to handover his filled out forms, he saw the smile on Cagalli's face and knew that his future was going to look much brighter than what he had now.

Owari.


	6. Dangerous

**Title:** Dangerous  
**Rating:** K+  
**Warnings:** Unbeta-ed, some OOC-ness, ignore character death  
**Genre:** General, humour  
**Main Character(s):** Lunamaria, Rey, mentions of Shinn and a berk named Peter  
**Ship(s):** None  
**Summary:** It's hazardous to your health to date a former gundam pilot. One shot.  
**Disclaimer:** Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed, Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny, characters and places are copyright to Hajime Yate, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise.  
**Author's Notes:** I had opened up Corel and this idea just came to me so I started typing it out less than fifteen minutes which will explain the total weirdness. Rey is OOC in here because he's not the aggressive type, Shinn is. I wanted to expand his expression beyond that impassiveness he puts on. Peter is just some berk who's a total perv that I came up with. He's based on all those typical guys in tv series, movies or books.

* * *

When Peter asked her out for coffee, she had said yes immediately. After all, it was just for coffee and nothing else. He seemed such a nice guy; he was studying bio-engineering and he came from a rather well-to-do family. He didn't seem the type for perversion. So, when his hand started creeping up her thigh at the café under the table, her trigger reflexes, honed by years at the military academy, went into action and Peter found himself to sport an impressive black eye and a painful knee to his manly bits.

Lunamaria knew she should feel remorseful. The guy probably didn't mean any more harm than trying to cope a feel like every guy does, except she had hung out with guys like him and none had ever dared to even try what he did, save for throwing the affectionate arm around her in a playful manner. Shinn had done that plenty of times, so had Vino and Youlan. It wasn't even Peter's fault that her soldier reflex kicked when his hand went elsewhere other than the table. She should really apologize.

But she didn't.

Try as she might, she couldn't seem to muster up any apologetic feelings at all to him. Some of the girls had congratulate her for giving him that right hook, calling him a perv. A few of the patrons were staring at them over their cups of coffee, whispering to each other, most probably about how strange she was.

It was Rey who had arrived at the café to pick her up, after she had called him on her cell. She wasn't sure what she had said to him but it must have been bad because he arrived looking far more murderous than he'd ever exhibited to anyone. Not even when he was piloting his mobile suit to kill. It suddenly made her glad that she hadn't call Shinn up. The dark-haired boy had the habit of 'shoot now, ask later' and Peter might suffer more than just a black eye and wounded pride. She could just imagine Shinn piloting his new gundam, stomping the poor guy to pancake. Rey, at least, was much more rational.

Rey had given Peter another black eye, and looked set to break the guy's arm. Peter looked like he might wet his pants. Or worse.

Or not.

The girls around the café weren't helping the matter as they squealed over the Rey's looks, egging him on. The café manager looked like he wanted to call the police but his hand kept on hovering over his phone and never picking it up.

Luna sighed. Better break it off before the manager really call the police and they end up in lock up. Murrue-san would not be pleased if it happened. She grabbed Rey's arm before he could split Peter's lip, pulling him back and telling him to let it go. He gave her a long look then at Peter and told her curtly that next time, he'll let pervs grope her if she failed to do background checks on them. The added threat of telling on Shinn shut up any angry protests she might have hurled at him. She scowled at his retreating back, turned back to Peter to offer him a hand up.

The guy stared at her like a deer caught in headlights, squeaked in fear and fled, hobbling down the street, muttering things about 'dangerous', 'crazy', 'never look at redheads again' as he disappeared into the afternoon crowd. Luna sighed again, pinching the bridge of her nose, left some bills on the table and went outside to see Rey waiting for her by the door. He raised an eyebrow at her. She scowled.

Later that night during dinner, when Shinn innocently asked her if she had fun on her little date, she buried her face in her arms, groaned and said that she's swearing off dates for good. Having someone date a former pilot – a gundam pilot and a ZAFT Red at that – was hazardous to the health.

She didn't see the wicked grin on Shinn's face.

Owari.


	7. Remember

**Title:** Remember  
**Rating:** K+  
**Warnings:** Unbeta-ed, some OOC-ness, ignore character death  
**Genre:** General, angst  
**Main Character(s):** Rey, Kira  
**Ship(s):** None.  
**Summary:** It was the anniversary of the second Bloody Valentine War. One shot.  
**Disclaimer:** Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed, Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny, characters and places are copyright to Hajime Yate, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise.  
**Author's Notes: **I just love Angst!Rey too much. He makes a much cuter broody boy than Kira or Athrun.

* * *

It was the anniversary of the end of the second Bloody Valentine War; it was also the anniversary of Gilbert Dullindal's death, though not many will remember that. Everyone will remember that day had been the day that the year long war had ended, after claiming many casualties on both sides, friends, enemies, and allies. Nearly everyone had turned up at the memorial. The day had been declared a day of remembrance by Cagalli, as a day for everyone to remember their lost loved ones and to remember the reason why they should not engage in another senseless war.

The service had ended a little over 11, the crowd having disperse some time ago, leaving only the handful behind. The sky was overcast today, the wind blowing from the sea rather cold, signalling that another downpour would start soon. The weather had been unpredictable lately, one moment a false sunshine cheer and the next, a dreary rainy sky.

Rey crouched down to place the floret of irises among the many flowers that had been placed there earlier by the people; he had supplied his own white rose to the pile earlier but this one was personal. It was for the man that the world would rather forget and not remember, the man who will be forever etched in the pages of history as someone who had instigated the second Bloody Valentine War and who had broken off the already shaky alliance with ORB. PLANT's new chairman was now patching up the relationship between PLANT and ORB, once again, forming an alliance between the two.

He stood up, reaching up a hand to tuck the wayward hair behind his ear as he looked at the smooth marble surface of the cenotaph. Whoever had been commissioned to make this had been more than just talented, carving each and every name of person who had died in the two wars on the surface. The way the names were carved into the marble were done painstakingly and lovingly, as if the person wanted those who came to the cenotaph to remember them all.

PLANT was holding its own memorial service up there as well. He had seen it earlier on the news as he waited for Murrue and Mwu to be ready. He had wondered, as Murrue ushered him towards the front door, all the while saying they were going to be late, if those at PLANT will remember him today.

Perhaps not.

War heroes were remembered.

Those who instigated the wars were remembered but it's more like remembering the sour taste of lemons in your mouth. Or the bitterness of medicine on your tongue.

Men like Patrick Zala, Jibril and Gilbert Dullindal were remembered for their atrocities and their hands at the wars. They won't be remembered for whatever past greatness they had done or the smallest good deed they did in the past. No one will remember that.

Touching the cool surface of the cenotaph, Rey wondered if he will be remembered in the years to come, how he will be remembered by. Someone who is associated with Gilbert Dullindal, who fought against ORB's ideals? Or someone who had realized his mistake and is now trying to turn things around? Or just a clone of Rau Le Cruest and nothing more? He wondered, how was Gilbert remembered on this day?

He remembered it clearly like it was yesterday, his memories of the man whom he had come to respect and even love, as the father he never had. Gilbert never coddled him during his childhood, hardly ever need to hide the truth from him but there was only one time he did; when Rey had been seized by the sudden attack, and had wondered, wheezing and in pain, why. That was the first and last time Gilbert had ever lied to him that day. It was also the day that he knew he was different from everyone else.

Gilbert had been kind but his kindness had not extended beyond Rey or Talia. Everyone else around him was a pawn to be used accordingly in his plan, to set things in motion.

Rey had been a part of it, one of the pawns used until the last moment. Kira Yamato had broken that fragile belief of his existence, shattered it to tiny shards until he could never gather them back, had no choice but to move forward on his own two feet.

A shadow fell across him, and he saw who it was from the sideway glance.

Kira Yamato placed a single white rose on the pile, put his hands together in a prayer, head bowed briefly before lifting his head up.

"He will want to be remembered," he said, simply.

Rey smiled. Trust Kira to be empathetic enough to know and understand.

"I know he'll be glad to know that," said Rey, quietly.

Owari.


	8. Familiar Stranger

**Title:** Familiar Stranger  
**Rating:** PG  
**Warnings:** Unbeta-ed, AU, ignore character death  
**Genre:** General, angst  
**Main Character(s):** Rey  
**Ship(s):** None.  
**Summary:** They finally meet face to face with each other. One shot.  
**Disclaimer:** Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed, Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny, characters and places are copyright to Hajime Yate, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise.  
**Author's Notes:** Inspired by Nanashi's wonderful oneshot, **_Thief_**. GO AND READ IT NOW! I am taken by the idea that Talia could have, might have named her son after Rey, as Nanashi had written. This isn't the same as her story because 1) Rey is alive here and not dead and 2) He finally meet with Talia's son. I wrote this two weeks ago, left it on my computer because it was crappy, hated it, before I finally sat down and rewrote the entire thing again from scratch, ditching the first draftbut keeping the title, and here it is.

* * *

He walked down the well-trodden path, the shadows from the trees providing cool shades from the sun. Rows upon rows of off-white and grey marble gleamed in the sunlight, like polished jewels, letters carved in their surfaces, names of people who had moved on. Memories and testaments of their time here in this world, signs that they had been here once before.

He walked pass the marble headstones, blue eyes sweeping over each name, mouthing them silently, as if committing them to memory, when he was actually not. The thought of his name engraved on one of those marble pieces one day brought no change of expression on his stoic expression. He had moved forward. Thoughts like that didn't plague his dreams as much as it used to. Friends and almost family taught him that. When he arrived at the site – the final resting place for many of those who had been in service during the war or were a part of the war – he found someone else there before him.

A boy of twelve or so, kneeling before one particular headstone, head bowed seemingly in prayer. When he approached, the boy's head lifted up, a pair of blue eyes turned to him. There was no surprise or accusation on the boy's face; it was as blank as his own. He ignored the boy, proceeding to place the flowers by the headstone, under the gold letters of a familiar and well known name.

"My mother," said the boy, breaking the silence around them, "always longed for you, even after I was born. Her own flesh and blood, a substitution for the boy she never could have and wanted to have."

Rey said nothing. He noted the underlying bitterness along with the weary and satirical tone. It was the tone of someone who had seen too many dreadful things in life to name, someone who had what little happiness snatched away abruptly. Such a tone was not meant for someone as young as him and more appropriate for someone like Shinn or perhaps Athrun.

The tone suited him because he was also a child of war. One who had lost his mother to one man's greed, power and ambition. Who watched the news day by day, watching and listening for anything on his mother. A mother who had left him and his father at the first chance to return to the military without second thoughts. But she wasn't that kind of mother; she still thought about her son, still looked at the photo she had on her desk with a wistfulness and longing. She just had her priorities confused with the matters of heart.

"She chased after a dream that can never be," murmured Rey, eyes flicking downward to the boy then to the headstone before them.

"I never thought to actually meet you here, of all places," the boy continued. "I had so many things which I stored up in my head and heart to say to you when I finally meet you. But nothing seems to come to my mind now," he said. "Nothing."

The wind – artificial as it may be – was still cold to the feel as it breezed by them, rustling the grass and the leaves on the nearby trees. In the distance, Rey could see a family meandering by the rows of polished marbles, carrying flowers in their arms, the smallest child was clutching at a single white rose in her chubby hand. They were visiting one of the graves – perhaps a son or a brother who died in this war or the last war.

"It's unfair to think that you're here instead of her," the boy said, finally getting up, dusting ineffectually at the grass stains on his pants. "But life isn't always fair, is it? She always did loved that man more than my father, enough to even die with him." He gave a sharp bark of laughter, hollow and bitter.

"I'm sorry." He had no idea why he said it. To make amends? It seemed the right thing to say.

"Don't." The boy shook his head. "Don't apologize. I don't want to hear it. Pity isn't what I want. Least of all, yours. After all," he said, "I should be the one who's sorry for you. For starving for attention and love to steal it from someone else's mother." (1)

Rey showed no emotion at the words. He looked forward, at the family in the distance, hearing the boy's clothing rustle, a sign that he was moving. The boy's footsteps were soft on the ground but Rey heard them perfectly, and halfway, they paused.

"She named me after you," said the boy. "Ray. A reminder of the child she wanted and the one that she really loved."

The boy – Ray – then left.

Rey knelt down on the grass, unmindful of the stains to his dune-coloured khakis, lifting up a hand and placing it against the cool marble.

_Talia Gladys_. _Beloved Wife and Mother_.

"I didn't steal her," he said, softly. "She came to me first, and you're wrong. She did loved you. You were the last person on her mind before she died."

Owari.

**Extra: **

(1) This is a line from Nanashi's **_Thief_**, a wonderful story written by her on my favourite character, Rey. She writes the best GSD stories out there. Do go and read **_Thief_** and her other GSD fics, specially **_Biography of The Damned_** which is an excellent piece of work.


	9. Resolution

**Title:** Resolution  
**Rating:** PG  
**Warnings:** Unbeta-ed, AU, ignore character death  
**Genre:** General, angst  
**Main Character(s):** Shinn, Rey  
**Ship(s):** None.  
**Summary:** I want to be a soldier so that I can protect those that I love and care about and fight for those who can't. One shot.  
**Disclaimer:** Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed, Kidou Senshi Gundam Seed Destiny, characters and places are copyright to Hajime Yate, Yoshiyuki Tomino, Sotsu Agency and Sunrise.  
**Author's Notes:** This is a little disjointed in some places. Most are Shinn's rather disjointed thoughts, a couple flashback and the present. I'm trying to explain the reason why he would be willing to enlist back into the military once more. There is a reference to the third drabble, **_Rain_** but you don't to read that to read this.

* * *

_Why do you want to be a soldier?_

_For whom do you fight for? _

_For what do you fight for?_

I want to be a soldier because I want to protect the people from suffering the same fate as I did. I fight for the people and their dreams. I fight so that a repeat of the war two years ago won't happen again.

_Liar._

_It did happened again, didn't it? So many people had died, whether they had participated in the war or not. You chose to be a soldier for your own selfish wish and desire. For vengeance on your family and loss. You want to avenge their senseless deaths by that gundam and the easiest way is to become a soldier. Come, there is no need to deny it. After all, it is the truth. _

_In the end, it is all down to revenge._

He will admit to the truth. That the reason he had enrolled in the academy and become a Red ZAFT. To avenge his family's death. That was all there is to it. Those smiles and words about protecting the people, fighting for the people were just that. Words only. A lot of bull, even to his own ears. He never had the people's interest at heart. If he had, he wouldn't have nearly destroyed ORB and killed Cagalli Yula Athla. He would never have tried to kill Kira Yamato. He would never had tried to kill Athrun Zala and nearly cut through Lunamaria to get to him.

It was all just down to one thing and one thing only.

Revenge.

"_Not everyone has to have a noble cause to join the military and be a soldier," Rey had said, when he asked the earlier. He sniffed. "Like Athrun or Kira-san."_

"_Then, you were planning on genocide along with the Chairman that time when you joined?" he had asked, half-jokingly. _

_Rey had looked at him thoughtfully, until he fidgeted uncomfortably at the stare. Then, a small smile. "I wanted to make the world a better place," he said, turning back to look at the setting sun. "So that there'll be no more wars, no more conflicts. Everyone will live as equal, not as Coordinators or Naturals or Newtypes. Just as people."_

"_Then, do you still want to? That dream, I mean?" _

"_That would make the world a very boring place now would it? If everyone was the same?" Rey had sounded amused, his blue eyes twinkled merrily. He then turned serious in an instant. "I wouldn't want that for anyone. Each person is different, special, unique in their own way. We are our own self and no one else's. Gil– Dullindal's plan... it was wonderful when you listen to it but in reality, it wasn't. Because everyone deserves to live their lives the way they want it and be who they want to be."_

The light from the moon created funny patterns on the ceiling as he stared up at it, one hand on his stomach and his other hand behind his head as he laid on the bed. Rey was sleeping soundly beside and below him on the futon, blanket drew up over his head, until only some tufts of blonde hair could be seen peeking out. He smiled, amused; his best friend always did sleep that way, even from way back in the academy.

I wanted to be a soldier because I wanted to defeat that gundam and the pilot, because I wanted revenge for my family, my pain, my sorrow and my hate.

He drew out the pink clamshell phone from under the pillow. He still carried it around, of course. He could never let it go, even if he had let go of his hatred, his pain and his sorrow. This was a part of his family, the last piece that tied him and them together. After all, he had nothing left of them when their home was destroyed. All that was left was Mayu's pink phone. He flipped the cover open, browse through the menu until he came to the gallery where she kept most of the photos. He stopped at a photo of them, looking at it for a long while.

"_Luna asked me again when I'm going to enlist in the military," he had said, as they lay on their respective sleeping places in the bedroom. Rey had offered – practically shoved – the bed to him while he took the futon on the floor. "She said something about how it's the one thing I can be good at and can do, blah, blah."_

"_Are you?" his best friend had asked, sleepily. _

"_I don't know..." _

"_Why do you want to join the military now? Is it because Luna wants you to or because you want to? For what reasons?" Rey had said, turning over and tugging the blanket high up. His voice was muffled. "You'll find your answer much easier the second time round. And don't think too hard or you'll hurt your head."_

_He had scowled at the already half-hidden boy, knowing Rey was smirking from behind that blanket. He needed to tell Luna to stop administering her dodgy humour on him. It was maddening at times. _

Why do you want to be a soldier? For whom do you fight for? For what do you fight for?

I want to be a soldier to protect everyone that I know and love, this place that I call home and love, families and friends that I care about. I want to fight for their sakes when they can't fight for themselves. I want to keep them safe so that none of them will have to face the horrors of war ever again.

He closed the phone, pushing it back under the pillow and rolled over on his side to sleep.

Tomorrow, he decided, sleepily. He will meet with Representative Athla at the base and tell her of his decision.

He hoped that Rey and Luna wouldn't too smug when he did tell them.

Owari.


End file.
